Graduating from Benedict College Burns…

editgradpic3One of my close friends graduated from Benedict College.
I was insulted by the venue of this graduation.
I don’t know whose idea it was to host a graduation in football field under 90 degree weather.
It was so hot; it felt like we were in an oven.
To make matters worse, the graduates were dressed in black robes sitting under the hot sun for hours.
Seriously, a lot of the guests were so hot that they had to miss watching the graduation.

Students don’t spend four years in college to get burnt on their graduation day.
The exposure to such extreme temperature under black robes is disrespectful to your students and their families.
For your next graduation, please think about the temperature and how it will affect your students on their big day.
Under the hot sun is the worst place to give long speeches and accolades.
Please be considerate of your students, their friends and families.

Congratulations to the class of 2015.

Divorce is NOT an option!!

I am at the stage in my life where I am accepting applications for 9jaboy4real, if you are interested email me at 9jagirl4real@gmail.com (only serious applications will be accepted, LOL!!). In a few years, I will be married and have children (by God’s grace). Even though, I am not yet married I am always thinking about what’s best for my children. What’s best for my children guides a lot of my decisions because if I like it or not; the decisions I make now will affect my children positively or negatively. I don’t want my children to suffer for the poor decisions I make in life.

I went to college with a guy who said that his dad lived down the street from his house but he refused to walk a few blocks to come see him. I saw the pain in that boy’s eyes from that day, I decided I’d never make a careless decision that will jeopardize my children’s happiness. I grew up with both my parents so I don’t fully understand what it means to only have one parent and rejection by another parent. I have heard of enough stories of children who felt abandoned by their father and I can’t imagine the emotional pain they go through every day. In life you can’t control what happens to you most of the time but what I can control I will.

Statistics are against children from broken homes. I have seen how broken families mess up children and I don’t want to put my children through that. Divorce affects the children more than it affects the parents. For the sake of my children, divorce can’t be an option.

Don’t get me wrong in the presence of verbal or physical abuse; divorce has to be an option because I need to stay alive to take care of my children. African women will do anything for their children and I am no different.
I don’t want to bring my children into an emotional mess. Each child deals with divorce in their own way. It is not God’s will for my children to be born into a broken home. My children deserve the right to have parents walking side by side to give them a better future.

To 9jaboy4real (whoever you are): Divorce is NOT an option!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Do you notice patterns in your love life?

Do you keep attracting the same types of people?
It is weird how that happens.
One of my close guy friends noticed a relationship pattern in his love life.
For example, the people he is attracted to and the people that are attracted to him have the same career path (medical doctors or students). Even the people that he is attracted to and he knows nothing about them always end up being pre-med or medical students for some reason.
For me, I have notice a relationship pattern as well.
Most of the guys, I have talked or dated have being very significant males born child in their families. It is so weird. Even the once I am attracted to and I know nothing about them have been very significant male born of their families.
The crazy thing is that even the guys that are innocently attracted to you fit the same relationship pattern.
Do you guy notice patterns in your love life?

 

Our Choices.. Our kids!!

ImageI was talking to a girl who is pregnant and working in a fast food.
I thank God America takes good care of their children.
If I was having this conversation in Nigeria, God knows I would be crying.
How can a young girl raise up a child with a fast food paycheck? It’s impossible!
Completely Impossible!
I asked her about the child’s father, if he will do anything to support her when the baby is here.
She said, she wasn’t sure that she told him to get it together before the baby comes.

Ladies,
Babies don’t mature men; responsible men are responsible before they bring a child into this world.
Don’t expect anything to change if you decide for whatever reason to have a child with a man who is immature.
Ladies the decision you make affect will affect your child for the rest of their lives.
If we knew the power we have over our children’s’ life, we would be more careful with our decisions.
Even though, I have no kids now, I still have to think how my decisions will affect my kids.

If I choose to have kids out of wedlock will affect my kids.
If I choose to have kids with someone who doesn’t love me will affect my kids.
If I choose to have kids with someone who doesn’t want kids will affect my kids.
If I choose to have kids with someone I married will affect my kids.
If I choose to have kids with someone who is immature will affect my kids.

I want my kids to have a father and mother who love them living in the same house taking care of them.
I want my kids to have their father in their lives.
I want my kids to have everything they need to make them successful.
I want my girls to grow up to be intelligent, God-fearing, virtuous, strong and great contributors to our society.
I want my boys to grow to be like their father.

It may not happen how I want it to happen but I am not going to set myself for failure by having a child with someone whom I am not married to or not responsible.
To be honest, I don’t want baby-daddy drama. I don’t want to beg any guy to take care of their responsibility.
I want the best for my kids for this reason, I have to choose wisely.

Women your choices will affect your children. Choose wisely!!!